What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
