Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize