I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize