Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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