think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Randomize