More tranny stories later!
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize
