okay pat passed out under dana's car
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
