don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Randomize