Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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