We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
