I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
