i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
