did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
