stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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