Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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