Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize