It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
