If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Randomize
