just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
