At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize