And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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