do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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