I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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