Non-Jews are for practice
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
What a dumb baby whore.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
