i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
