Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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