The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Is it because I queefed?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize