But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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