you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Is Oprah even human
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
