mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I'm jealous of your bromance
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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