we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
