i don't like sucking hair
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
