would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
