I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
