Well apparently he's into motor boating.
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
as a side note pls kill me
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize