Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
