My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize