so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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