How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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