Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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