y did u give ur computer a hand job?
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
