just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
