after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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