Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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