is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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