I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
