question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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