matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
