Well apparently he's into motor boating.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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