If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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