We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Randomize
